Shadows In Her Heart (eBook)

K.E. Beckham (Autor)

eBook Download: EPUB

2024 | 1. Auflage
426 Seiten
Bookbaby (Verlag)
979-8-3509-8038-7 (ISBN)

Infos

When a dark family secret comes out, Skye Selene Ravenswood, the child of one of the most influential families in Bristol and her partner are faced with a problem they never thought they'd have.

K.E. Beckham wrote their first novel at the young age of fifteen as a way to cope with their own struggles after finding a passion for creating something from nothing.

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Skye never thought that her parents could do something quite so evil, but then again, she never questioned how they had so much wealth. Perhaps they were just big investors. Of course, it wouldn't be that simple, though. When she is dragged into the family business, it tears her apart, but she doesn't have a choice. She has to do this. She has to stay alive for Jax, for Acea, for Lilith. She has to figure out what's right and wrong, but that line is blurred. She could keep doing this and live in fear forever or take an enormous risk and potentially lose her life. Not only hers but those of Jax and her friends, too.

Textauszug

“I can’t believe it, how could they just say that to their own child it’s a bunch of bullshit” A teenage girl with short messy black hair and pale grey eyes mumbled to herself, carrying a backpack in her left hand.

They do what they’ve done and yet they still expect me to obey their every command. They try to make me in their image, but never will I do what they have done.

She often stressed about how she looked, and the school uniform made it worse. She was rather tall and slim, with a cool undertone to her white skin. She had her ears pierced and she had an industrial piercing. She was wearing a grey skirt and a white button-down shirt with a striped tie. It was the school uniform she was supposed to wear for her private school. She was slouched, barely ten feet from the door of her house, which was a very large building with white paint and black trimmings. The yard was well taken care of by the gardener her parents had hired. She knew well she was supposed to head directly to school, and that one of the people her parents had hired would snitch on her if she didn’t, but she figured she would just deal with the consequences when she got back. What’s a bit of pain anyways? She heaved her bag over her shoulder and walked to her partner’s house which was only a few blocks away. As she walked she tried to distract her mind from the painful thoughts that came whenever there was silence. She tried to think of things with humour and joy, but it just turned into blunt anger about her conversation with her parents earlier.

I swear their fucking conservative ass mindsets will make it so I NEVER can ever start T. It should be my decision, not theirs but NOOOOOOOOO since I’m not an elderly person they get to make all the decisions about MY life. I’d be happier if I was able to come out and be myself, but the risk is too great.

She walked to the front door of a cosy little house and knocked on the door heavily, reminding herself after that she doesn’t need to knock with the force of a police officer just because she was angry, and that it was seen as impolite.

Father wouldn’t be happy with me, I’m supposed to ‘act like a lady’ gentle and elegant. Fuck that, fuck being a lady. I just want to be me.

She heard shuffling, then the voice of a teenage boy insisting that he open the door. The door drifted slowly open, and she smiled as she saw the face of her partner. He was tall, he had curly shoulder-length red hair and his eyes were such a dark brown someone could mistake them as black. He deviated from the school’s uniform and wore a neatly tied plain black tie with his button-down shirt and slacks. His blazer was immaculate, not even a hair sullied his uniform. He was a silver-tongued man, his words held a great deal of power. His voice was deep and had a low rasp to it. He was barely over a year older than Skye.

“JAX,” she shouted, inviting herself in, “JAX JAX JAX.”

“Skye, Skye Skye Skye,” He replied, monotone.

“Please tell me you still have the clothes I told you to hold so I don’t get in huge trouble for having them after I foolishly bought them with my allowance because I cannot stand this infernal skirt or looking so FU-” she stopped herself there, noticing his parents and siblings at the dining tablet less than twenty feet away.

He laughed, “Yes, of course I do. You seem upset, do you want to talk about it?” he asked, walking with her to his room.

“Yes because it is so so so so so so so so so SO stupid what my mother and father said this morning and, yes, I know they probably just want me to represent the family in a way that they approve of and they want me to live up to the name but they- okay okay okay let’s go back a bit.” She took a breath, “Lovely living with ADHD hyperactivity,” she said before continuing her story, “My parents said ‘if a girl is born a girl, they are a girl, and the same goes for boys.’ Then they told me I looked too much like a boy with my short hair and I need to grow my hair out, wear makeup, and they even encouraged me to stuff my bra. It’s creepy enough that they say that but then they have the audacity to say that if you weren’t male they wouldn’t let me date you. That’s not their choice to make! What if I were gay? I practically am, certainly it is a less than heterosexual relationship. Back to the hair thing, I only cut it not too long ago! I had really fucking long hair per their request for my whole life, I don’t want to go back to long hair when I prefer short hair so much more. It feels more like me. It shouldn’t be up to them!”

“And that happened this morning before you left?” Jax asked as he dug in his closet, “I agree that it is unacceptable, and that they should let you make your own choices, but there isn’t a lot that you can do,” He said.

I’m well aware, or I would have done something to change this all. I don’t want to fear for my safety being a trans man in their house.

Skye sat on his bed, “yeah,” she said.

“They don’t know you’re here do they? They think you’re on your way to school,” He said, already knowing the answer.

“Well, of course they don’t know I’m here. But I assumed I could catch a ride to school with you so that I can get there on time? I didn’t want to have to go to school in this fuuuhhh– infernal skirt,” Skye said, correcting her language.

“Certainly. Bold of you to risk your parent’s anger by disobeying them, but it is even more bold of them to make such closed minded statements.” He handed Skye a pair of neatly folded trousers. His tone changed as he stepped back and lifted her chin to look her in the eye. “Please, be safe. It would be wise to not tell them your gender identity or sexual orientation. I do not condone lying, but in this situation, when it concerns your safety,” he closed his door to the point that it was barely open and turned to face the wall, giving Skye Privacy to change, “And never forget that you are always welcome here, my parents don’t mind, and my siblings can go” He lowered his voice to a whisper, “Fuck themselves.” He went back to talking normally, “I’m certain that they would not mind if you stayed for a few nights if you ever need to, and if you ever need a place to hide I’ll call in a favour from Forrest. He’d be more than happy to help you if I ask.”

I might need to. If I’m ever outed to them it could end poorly. I don’t want more scars, I have plenty.

“Yeah, your parents are cool. They don’t have an issue with either of us being demi or me being trans, lucky you, your parents aren’t judgemental pieces of shit. Round of applause!” She paused, “I don’t think I would ever need to hide from my parents, they may be assholes, but unless it’s life or death I can handle things,” She said, now dressed in trousers. She put her hand on his arm and he turned to look at her.

“Would you like a blazer, a different tie, rings, anything like that?” He asked.

“A blazer would be nice,” She answered.

He shuffled in his closet again looking for either one of his that would fit, or the one that she bought. He found one of his, a nicer one that fit him a bit small. It should fit her a little big, but not too large. She put on the blazer and held her arms out slightly.

“Well, how do I look?”

“You look so bloody good, if we didn’t have to get out that door about ten minutes ago I would kiss you, but we really must be going, we’ll be late,” Jax said.

“Okay okay okay okay” she said, grabbing her bag from off of the floor. Jax grabbed a bag and they ran out of his room.

His parents were already waiting in the car. They both got in the back seat and his parents drove them to their school. Skye took a deep breath before they both got out of the car. Their school was massive. Skye’s parents had helped Jax’s parents pay for him to go there. Jax prioritised his education, but he was nearly forced to drop out due to financial struggles, so Skye spoke with her parents and worked something out. She would receive less allowance and if her grades dropped even the tiniest bit she wouldn’t receive a single pound sterling in return for Jax being able to go to such a nice school. Skye looked at Jax with concern, to which he grinned and offered her his hand. Skye took his hand and straightened her posture.

“No matter how many days I go here it’s always the same,” Skye whispered barely loud enough for Jax to hear.

Jax gave a squeeze to Skye’s hand and a small comforting smile. At the doors they had to part, going to different classes. Jax was a grade above Skye, so during school hours they didn’t see each other, except for at lunch and passing in the corridors. The day was uneventful up until lunch.

Lunch came and Skye skipped the eating part. She preferred to watch everyone during this time. You could learn so much from watching people. She leaned on a wall outside, watching people jump the fence and the popular girls gossiping. It made her want to gag. They’re so fake, their faces were caked in so much makeup and the worst part was that their foundation was much too dark and clearly was the wrong match. She knew every single one of them by name. When they found out who her family was they asked her to sit with them, yet they only wanted to be her friends to use her for her money and status.

Just because my family has money doesn’t mean I’m just an ATM. I’m well aware that my family is among the most prestigious in Bristol, but that doesn’t mean that I’m less than human. They can go fuck themselves for all I care.

There was Amaya, she was the “leader” of the...

Produkt-Details

• Erscheint lt. Verlag: 25.10.2024
• Sprache: englisch
• Themenwelt: Literatur ► Romane / Erzählungen
• ISBN-13: 979-8-3509-8038-7 / 9798350980387